Fire Within: Teresa of Avila, John of the Cross and the Gospel on Prayer (Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M.)
https://ignatius.com/fire-within-fwp/
(If you are catching up: chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 3, chapter 4, chapter 5, chapter 6, chapter 7, chapter 8, chapter 9, chapter 10, chapter 11, chapter 12, chapter 13, chapter 14, chapter 15, chapter 16)
Chapter 17 “Liberating Completion”
10/27/25 [daily Mass readings] - Mon - 11:38 am. In a waiting room (while someone else has an appointment) — I have brought a mug of hot tea which is too hot to drink + have somewhat burned my tongue on it. FINAL CHAPTER (novissimum or ἔσχατον). I’ll try taking the lid off, Lord, + putting the mug in sight so I don’t knock it over? [I did not knock it over so this plan was a success.]
“Liberating completion” - chap 17. The mystic (the author says) is “opened out and freed for everything” — God’s go-fer. “Transforming enthrallment” is a good phrase. “The deepest prayer rests the heart” although the situation in which a person lives is still what it has been — but a person might have the courage to do something about it — or the charity to love the difficult people in it, seeing Christ (weary on his road) in them. We beg God to do something and what does He do? Not nothing but not what we had expected. “Why the human spirit is rested by nothing in the created order” — a contrast increasingly evident: a good dinner vs. puffed rice cakes (unsalted) perhaps. But habits die hard they say (it is not necessarily so, but commonly.)
“MYOPIA” — has a “y” in it, must be from Greek. [etymology]. “The nonmystic is imprisoned in pettiness” — a slave to the opinions of others [here I was thinking of how unpleasant it is for me to be afflicted with vanity], or an athlete in the perpetual chasing after wind.
“FROM SUFFERING INTO FREEDOM” — a person can think “I have trapped this one in a cage — because they could never live without x” [I am recalling that someone said this about me to a third party, x=books] but the door is open and this one can walk right out anytime [which I did]. “For the worldly person pain can be a prison” — I would add that anxiety is a kind of pain and can also be a prison. — “tending as it does to focus attention on oneself to the almost total exclusion of others” ... stubbing one’s toe, etc. one could think “the suffering of the poor souls in purgatory is much greater than this” and offer it to God for their liberation — or “Christ endured much greater pains to save souls from the torments of hell and I could freely accept this pain, holding it uplifted figuratively in my hands to the Father for the filling up of Christ’s mystical body’s cooperation in His sacrifice” — much too long a thought — the idea has to be visited beforehand and then in the moment of sharp pain the thought is “that”, pointing to it by reference. (Q.V.)
12:01 pm - the tea is approaching “drinkable” but I ought to pray MDP [mid-day prayer in the breviary] — on my phone...
... prayer finished, tea drinkable, all is right w/ the world, Lord, except that I did not sleep as much as I wanted to last night; however I will leave that problem at Your door. [i.e. I am asking God to make it better this week.]
“Nothing... can separate us from the love of God...” — I think we are not talking about the passive purgations in which we may have the impression or feeling of having been abandoned by God (as a blunt priest said in a homily: “slap your cheek - did you feel it? you still exist and God who holds you in existence still loves you + has not abandoned you” [paraphrased.]) but it was to these people St. John of the Cross wrote so that they could find in this felt privation great joy in the knowledge that it is God remodeling the kitchen (and everything else) ... all is well, or will be. When we begin to identify this taste as “God” (we cannot really taste God) then we are able to welcome it, to say “whatever You want, do it”, and to desire (as it fades) that it continue “as long as You want” rather than be grateful it is over + hope “never again”.
“APOSTOLIC POWER” — a charming paragraph about spiration and the being sent. Each of us is sent (correct me if I’m wrong, Lord, or silently let me blunder into hedges if You prefer) into his own present circumstances... like the two children at the end of The Silver Chair (in some cathartic wish fulfillment on the part of the author perhaps) return to their awful boarding school [where they turn the tables]. We expect to have some grander destiny — e.g. Luke Skywalker getting off of Tatooine... Wart, pulling the sword out of the stone... Taran, pig herder, is eventually king or something... (Bilbo just wants to get back home in one piece.) But we are already in the grand adventure to which we have been called; we just don’t recognize it as such.
“RENEWAL OF THEOLOGY” — yes, a theology that is not kneeling is rubbish [the phrase “kneeling theology” appears to have come from Hans Urs von Balthasar]... give me theologians leaning their head on the tabernacle and weeping, or whatever Aquinas is claimed to have done [I think it’s an urban legend unless someone can cite a source]. “A single example of this glaring omission” — have I not been frustrated too by the insistence that the best people can hope for is to find a companion for as long as they both shall live and to enjoy physical intimacy + friendship? [Then the appointment was over and so was my writing in the waiting room.]
10/31 [daily Mass readings] — it looks like I was ranting, Lord; forgive me. I should not get mad at other people when I am a tangled mass of deficiencies myself. — What can we do? Pray for priests, and also for theologians; disengage from people who are very online because we should not encourage them w/ attention; instead pray that they will leave room in their day for an encounter w/ the incomprehensible God; be willing to share when prompted to. But there is a long time (or a short time? I wouldn’t know which) when we are not durable enough to turn attention to teaching others and St. Teresa talks about the temptation to do so. [Remedies for this temptation:] “Keep your eyes on your own work” or “stay in your lane” — and flee occasions of singularity and pride. Recall “we have a Savior and it is not me”.
“A LIVING WORD OF GOD” — What I would take from this paragraph is that it is helpful to read the writings of saints, but also, it is helpful to read reverent biographies of saints: how did Christ shine forth in their life?
St. Paul says “I live now, not I, but Christ lives in me” [my attempt to remember Gal 2:20]. We read the lives of saints + think “I can’t do that” — correct, Lord, b/c it is You who did that. But we read the writings of these two saints [St. Teresa of Jesus and St. John of the Cross describing the stages of the spiritual life] and we ought to see “this is how You did that — this is the general pattern of Your benevolent invasion — and You desire this also for me”. No one person will look exactly like another but in Your plan, in Your desire (which we can reject) no one is to be left behind. “No child (of God) left behind” in this school of holiness. I hope I can read my writing later. [Sure, I’ve deciphered worse.]
“THE WEDDING” — life is a comedy in which everyone is married at the end! to You!
— it’s true that one thing that happens is the ability to never be bored. People cannot conceive that heaven will not become boring because they have not yet experienced this in this life (the road to that could be pretty dry though, so the way to not be bored is to accept first a great deal of being bored — or — do not desire to not be bored.) We have to choose to look toward You and to stop the vain pursuit of satisfaction in creatures. I have in no way got the hang of that yet.
It is tremendously important also to be patient w/ oneself and willing to endure the pace at which You work and the fathomless incapacity of oneself for any good apart from You.
To God be all glory + honor forever and ever amen.
We will read The Living Flame of Love next.
I will use the Study Edition from ICS Publications [I have not read that edition and it has been sitting on my bookshelf for a while] but it would be fine to use whatever is available to the reader.
The purpose of reading LFoL is to obtain courage and desire for our proper end.
These are necessary (how will we get there if we do not want to go? and how will we endure the trials along the way — which are essential, as gold or silver are purified — if we do not have courage?) (Cowardly Lion video [but instead maybe Brave (Sara Bareilles) wow I’ve never looked at its official music video before and I’m not sure what I think.])
The better part that cannot be taken away. That would be from Mary of Bethany. Please pray that SockReligious will decide to make some shirts or socks to commemorate her.
Yes, truth, goodness, and beauty only come from the Father, Who is love and goodness itself.
Pettiness and shortsightedness are prevalent. I have spent most of my life in that part of the world. I have been totally self centered not only when I am hurting but all the time. I have recently been more able to unite my sufferings to those of Jesus on the cross but John got it exactly right when he said suffering trials is due to weakness in virtue. That's a difficult road to travel but worth it.
I had never thought of the begetting and spiration of the Trinity could occur on the inside of a person. How awesome. What a wonderful way to look at the indwelling of the Trinity.
And certainly Dubay is right that the world thinks erotic pleasure is necessary for human fulfillment. Many are the people who think there must be something wrong with a person like me who has renounced my sexuality for the kingdom of God. They think a person can't be fulfilled without it, whereas once one has committed oneself to Jesus one can't have true fulfillment if one doesn't renounce it completely. That doesn't mean one doesn't realize the pleasures one gives up, it just means that having a deep relationship with Jesus is so much more. I can only pray that God gives us all the grace to do so.
Breathing
Thereby, alive
More than air:
The Spirit Itself
Unto perfected Union.